June 2010
1 post
May 2010
13 posts
How have I managed...
…to stay away for so long ? Sometimes I feel like the words are overflowing from me. Other times I feel like every thing I have to say is epitomized through the act of living. And it’s beautiful.
Don't you ever wish...
…that you could just start over ? I was talking to my mother yesterday; it was her birthday. I asked her if she remembered how she felt when she was young and if she ever imagined that she would be where she was now.
She told me that she remembers everything from the past, and I believe her, because she never forgets. She said she remembers going to school and being shy. She recalled...
It's quite early in the morning...
…I haven’t attempted to sleep yet. The birds are outside my window, finding love.
I’ve finally stopped being bombarded by swallows. I swear the heavens were trying to send me hundreds of signs in the form of bird, and it was scary.
And I have found that I am a limerent lover and suspect that I will always be. My heels will fly over my head as quickly as ever, and my heart will...
I was terrified...
…to look at you today. See, I was scared of all the words I couldn’t say. I was scared I’d fall into a million pieces, and you would think that I was beneath this. I was scared your eyes would crumble me to my knees, and I’d beg for your love the way I would in my dreams.
And you would have me. But I’m too scared to dream because dreaming hasn’t gotten me...
I feel great...
…that’s all.
There are passing moments of sadness.
But I just feel great.
A bird fell from the sky today...
…and it landed at my feet. She laid upside down with her limbs sprawled, outstretched, reaching. Her heart looked like it was pounding out of her chest, and I’d never seen anything so desperate. Her eyes looked so glassy staring up at me, like she wasn’t real.
I thought, “Poor thing…well, she’s not going to make it.”
I turned to the stranger next to...
I can't stop...
…
There was more...
…in what you didn’t say than in all of what you did say. And it is what you didn’t say that has crumbled me to my knees. It is everything that makes me weak and makes me stare out into the clouds, wishing I could be there.
It’s so that I will never have to see you again.
But I want to see you, more badly than I’ve wanted to see anything. I’ll miss your...
“The shoreline calls the sea for simple words and company,
but words go on and...”
– Deas Vail
4 tags
Well you've certainly managed to...
…put me under a spell. I have never had anyone take the thoughts from me the way you do. How can I open my mouth and have nothing but a longing sigh escape ? Where are the words that I hid behind so timidly in the past ? What will protect me now ? I am scared to be vulnerable and yet I tackle my way into situations that leave me so. Why then, do I barely know you ? And...
April 2010
6 posts
Why can't I seem to...
…convince myself to convince you ? This has been the longest semester…
You’ve seemed to bury every bit of strength I have.
“I’m not in that fucking band anymore. You can go see them play ‘Seven Years’....”
– When asked to play “Seven Years” during a recent acoustic set. (via fuckyeahanthonygreen) (via adicadabra)
“You leave me hoping—praying—that my love won’t show, cause I...”
– NJ&TheAdministration.
My dreams...
…are telling me things. And you’re in them, but I’ll gather my things and try to find my own way. I have to. I am too scared to need and too young to be brave.
March 2010
15 posts
I want to...
…get to know you.
Come to me. I won’t let you down.
I'm finding that I've...
…grown stronger than I’ve ever been.
Where are the beautiful things ? They’re everywhere. They’re all around me.
1, a goal...
…no more television unless it is educational.
Movies, however, are still within line because they are an art form and not garbage.
More to come…
What in the world...
…was I thinking when I built you up the way I did and put you on a pedestal ?
You are nothing.
And I am myself again.
I am everything.
“I wanted to touch him, to tell him that even if everyone left everyone, I would...”
– Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer
I have found that...
…in living my days without you, my body has grown tired, and my mind has grown weak. I cannot help but wonder where you have gone.
It feels like an eternity, but it has only been a week, that is, seven days. No, not even.
I cannot remember what my name is. It has been replaced with yours.
How can I...
…want you this badly ?
What does it take to be a blessed one ? We will find each other some day. My patience is infinite.
I thought I...
…broke his heart today as I entered the room.
He receded into a ball, cradling himself while I walked past. And from the other side, I caught a glimpse of his desperate expression, his face twisted into harsh angles.
I went to him, then.
I pulled myself up. I stomped over tables. I punched children out of the way. I swam through his ocean of tears and tasted the salt on my lips with each...
“The meaning of life is contained in every single expression of life. It is...”
– Michael Joseph Jackson
A sharp inhale...
…of breath every time he greets me. I cannot believe how wide my smile is capable of getting. I suspect that tomorrow will be a beautiful day, as it carries the characteristics of tomorrow. Tomorrow, tomorrow ! I will be lifted off into the sky with the birds, pulled by my very heartstrings, and I’ll take this boy with me. He’s most beautiful sprawled across the covers,...
I can't believe...
…I’m doing this again. He once told me that in order to be great, I must keep writing…as not to forget or fall out of habit. Pens, apparently, have a tendency to become strange and shy. So I’ll do what I have to here, and also, in a journal that I will keep next to myself at all times. Psychology.
September 2009
2 posts
“If you enter this world knowing you are loved and you leave this world knowing...”
– the King, Michael
August 2009
3 posts
“I’m just like anyone. I cut, and I bleed, and I embarrass easily.”
– the King
June 2009
2 posts
The Birds Will Think You're Quite A Legend
Second to Last Day of High School
Was there ever a time when being young did not mean growing up ? Were we ever young, simply to be young ? Or perhaps the time of youth moved too fast to grasp, for as the thought crosses my mind, I’ll admit the days I spent walking down the driveway in jelly shoes were the most fleeting.
The winters were coldest then—my frustration the more memorable...
May 2009
3 posts
Handsome Boy, Handsome Girl.
Pretty girl pretty girl You are softer than the sheets you lay upon Handsome boy handsome boy You are stronger than any man that’s come before you These are the words They have chosen to mark you Pretty boy oh pretty boy You are plumes of white smoke hanging in the sky Handsome girl oh handsome girl You are wide and built like bridges held on water These are the words They have chosen to mark...
A letter.
Well you’ve certainly grown, and if not that, then, my you’ve changed since the last time I saw you. For a second I thought your eyes lost their shine, your smile lost its touch…I’m not sure. Maybe your eyes are tired from the lack of sleep, and maybe the corners of your lips have been pulled down by your travels. How weary you must be.
It’s not impossible to find you in there. I may not be trying...
April 2009
1 post
FML.
Dealing with applying for colleges is the most horrible thing I’ve ever had to go through. First of all, I’m going to slaughter everyone at the U of M. Second of all, fuck community colleges. Third of all, I say screw having a good future. I’m going to go on the road, be a traveling musician/hooker just until I convince John Ohhh that I’m his soul mate and he takes me...
March 2009
10 posts
“positivity killed them all.
so we buried them.
but it brought them back to...”
– John
Weightless
I am inching towards the end of a very easy quarter of my life.
I finally got around to listening to “Weightless” by All Time Low, which, for you non-All Time Low fans, is their new song. Honestly, all I have to say is that Alex Gaskarth’s voice has progressively gotten higher and higher over the years, and he’s starting to sound like a chipmunk.
The song is alright....
In the Morning and Amazing...
I am in love. Believe it. This is what my life revolves around lately, and it is amazing. I am very happy.